How to deal with favoritism in your workplace: 6 tips to help you cope
Clinically reviewed by Dr. Chris Mosunic, PhD, RD, MBA
Is your hard work being overshadowed by the coworker your boss loves? Explore the impact of favoritism in the workplace and actionable steps you can take to address it.
You’ve been slogging away over a project at work for months, putting in overtime and picking up slack from colleagues, and yet someone else is getting all the credit again?
It’s frustrating and discouraging to feel like you’re constantly working behind the scenes and not receiving credit when credit is due. You’re probably questioning whether you’re truly valued, or if there’s something you’re doing wrong. But what if we told you that maybe the issue has little to do with your performance? And maybe, just maybe, there’s something you can do to solve it?
Addressing workplace favoritism is a skillset in its own right. Here’s how to address it without creating unnecessary conflict (and losing your cool.)
What is favoritism in the workplace? 5 examples
Favoritism in the workplace shows up when managers, supervisors, or team leaders treat some employees better than others without a clear reason. Unfortunately, we’ve all seen this in action.
The special treatment these employees receive may not relate to a worker’s performance, skills, or experience, but maybe their to personal connections, friendships, or something else entirely. Of course, sometimes people just hit it off more with some than others — that’s human nature. But favoritism can become problematic when it impacts work decisions, like project assignments and promotions.
While favoritism can look different in different workplaces, there are some common signs.
Unequal task distribution: This is when a manager consistently gives high-visibility projects or the best tasks to one employee.
Frequent compliments and praise for one person: This occurs when a boss openly favors certain employees with praise, even when others are performing just as well.
Ignoring certain employees’ mistakes: Certain employees may get a pass on mistakes or rule-breaking, while others face strict consequences.
Special privileges: Giving one person extra time off, more flexible schedules, or excusing them from required tasks, when others don’t get these benefits, is a sign of favoritism.
Fast-tracking promotions or raises: A favored employee getting promoted or given a raise over others without clear reason is a clear sign they’re being treated above other employees.
How favoritism in the workplace affects employees: 4 potential consequences
The negative effects of favoritism can ripple across the entire team and damage the workplace culture, resulting in several consequences that can cause lasting problems.
1. Lower morale: When employees see favoritism in action, they feel undervalued. Morale drops, and people feel less motivated to perform at their best. Some may even begin to resent their managers and jobs (or hate their job altogether).
2. Increased turnover: Persistent favoritism may push employees to leave if they feel their hard work isn’t recognized or rewarded. Why go above and beyond when others are receiving credit when credit isn’t due?
3. Team tension: Workplace favoritism can divide a team when some employees feel resentment toward both the favored employee and the manager. Not only can that affect teamwork, but it can also create a divide in the workplace and cause drama that could’ve been avoided.
4. Reduced productivity: When some employees feel overlooked, they may start contributing less, so there’s lower productivity and less innovation across the team.
6 tips for what employees can do about favoritism in the workplace
Dealing with workplace favoritism can be tricky and feel impossible. But it isn’t. By staying calm, professional, and strategic, you can manage the situation and stay focused on your path to success, even in challenging situations.
1. Stay professional and focused
You likely feel frustrated when favoritism gets in the way of recognition, but try not to let it affect your work quality. When you maintain your professionalism, it can help highlight your dedication and work ethic, which can be valuable if the issue ever comes up with human resources (HR) or other leaders. Keeping your integrity can help protect your reputation and shows you’re a valuable member of the team.
How to do it: Continue showing up with your best effort and commitment, and focus on yourself and things you can control — like meeting deadlines, delivering quality work, and staying consistent.
2. Document instances of favoritism
Keep a record of situations where favoritism seems to be at play, especially if you eventually decide to bring it up with HR or a supervisor. Concrete examples show your concerns are based on facts rather than perceptions, so others can understand the impact favoritism is having on you and the team.
How to do it: Be specific. Note the date, time, and details of what happened. If a favored employee received a high-profile project that was supposed to be shared or rotated among team members, write down exactly what happened and any conversations related to the assignment.
3. Have a private conversation with your manager
If favoritism is affecting your ability to grow or contribute fully, consider speaking directly with your manager. Preparing for a conversation with your manager can feel daunting and intimidating, but don’t let it. Remember that it’s their job to guide you and lead by example, which means being a place where open communication and honesty are encouraged and received.
How to do it: Set up a private, one-on-one meeting and approach the conversation calmly and respectfully. Focus on your desire to grow within the team and ask for feedback on areas where you can improve or get more involved. You’ll show your commitment to personal and professional development and keep the conversation positive, rather than confrontational.
You don’t necessarily need to mention favoritism directly at this stage — simply expressing your interest in taking on new opportunities can sometimes be enough to prompt change.
💙 Become more thoughtful with your communication with this guided meditation, Respond, Don’t React, from Eric López, PhD.
4. Build a support network of trusted colleagues
If favoritism is affecting your morale, talking with coworkers who may have noticed similar issues can help validate your feelings and provide a sense of camaraderie.
How to do it: Without gossiping or creating negativity, try to find people who understand your perspective. Together, you can support each other with advice or ideas for coping, which can help you feel grounded and stay positive. These 18 tips can also help.
5. Consider bringing your concerns to human resources
If favoritism continues despite your efforts, and it’s making work a misery and stalling your career progression, it’s time to speak with HR. Similarly to preparing to speak with your manager, preparing to speak with HR takes a little bit of work. Ensure you have documentation of the favoritism, a paper trail of a recap with meeting with your manager, and even testimonials from other colleagues to help strengthen your stance.
How to do it: Take the notes where you’ve documented what’s gone on, and focus the conversation on how favoritism is affecting the team. You might say, “I’ve noticed some patterns that seem to be affecting team morale and productivity, and I wanted to discuss them to see how we can create a more balanced environment.” By framing the conversation around the bigger picture, you can help HR see the broader impact, making it more likely they’ll take the issue seriously.
6. Take control of your growth
When favoritism affects your ability to advance in your current role, find other ways to keep developing your skills. Taking a proactive approach means you can keep moving forward, regardless of the favoritism around you. After all, you’re in control of your career trajectory, not a random leader or colleague.
How to do it: Look for online courses, training sessions, or networking opportunities in your industry to expand your skill set and keep growing professionally. Here are 22 other professional development opportunities for you to seek out.
Volunteer for cross-department projects or join industry groups, as these may open up new opportunities and build connections that might benefit your career in the long term. You should also feel empowered to leave your current job to pursue opportunities elsewhere.
💙 Explore the importance of Cultivating a Learning Mindset, with Professor Megan Reitz, at work, despite what (or who) may be trying to hold you back.
How managers can avoid favoritism in the workplace
If you’re in a position of leadership, you may hope to create a fair and balanced workspace. Favoritism, even when unintentional, can harm team morale and create a sense of unfairness, so it’s important to keep it in check. Be intentional about creating a fair and inclusive work environment where all team members feel valued and opportunities are shared.
The results will likely be a more engaged, motivated, and cohesive team, with higher morale and productivity. This can help your performance, and mean you attract and retain the best possible staff.
Set clear criteria for rewards and advancement
When employees know exactly what’s required for raises, promotions, or special projects, they’re less likely to feel overlooked or confused about who gets what.
Develop clear guidelines for performance reviews, task assignments, and advancement criteria, and communicate these openly to your team (these 13 tips can help).
Be transparent so everyone understands that recognition is earned through hard work and results, rather than personal relationships.
Base rewards on set criteria, so team members can set their own path forward. This can boost motivation and confidence.
Rotate responsibilities and opportunities
Giving each team member a fair shot at high-visibility projects or growth opportunities shows that everyone has a chance to develop.
Create a system for rotating responsibilities so each person gets to experience new challenges, leadership, and visibility.
If certain projects or meetings are typically led by one or two people, spread these opportunities across the team to help build everyone’s skills and show each team member they’re valued. It’s good for business continuity, too. If someone’s off sick, you’ve got experienced people to take up the reins.
Keep the work environment more dynamic and prevent any one person from feeling overly favored.
Use objective performance metrics
Subjective evaluations can unintentionally allow favoritism to slip in, so use objective metrics to track performance whenever possible.
Define measurable goals and key performance indicators (KPIs) that are relevant to each role, and evaluate each team member against these same standards.
Assess performance based on clear, consistent criteria so you can make fair decisions about assignments, raises, and promotions.
Keep evaluations focused on work outcomes rather than personal connections or personal biases.
Seek feedback from your team regularly
Asking your team for feedback on management practices can help you know how they’re feeling and if there are any concerns about fairness.
Try using anonymous surveys, one-on-one check-ins, or team discussions to encourage open communication. This creates a space for employees to voice any worries about favoritism and allows you to address them before they become larger issues.
Be open to feedback to show your team you care about their experience and are committed to creating a balanced environment. This helps build trust, so team members are more likely to approach you if they have concerns.
Show appreciation for all team members
Acknowledging each person’s hard work, ideas, and contributions helps everyone feel valued, so show appreciation whenever it makes sense.
Make an effort to recognize achievements across the team, whether big or small. Call out someone’s progress in a meeting, send a thank you email, or celebrate milestones and project completions. When you recognize everyone’s efforts, you build a culture of appreciation and inclusion.
Personalize your appreciation — acknowledge each person’s unique strengths so they know you see their individual value.
Avoid forming cliques or close friendships within the team
It’s natural to feel more comfortable around certain team members, especially when personalities or work styles align. However, as a manager, it’s important to maintain professional boundaries.
Keep interactions balanced and show an equal level of interest in everyone’s ideas, wellbeing, and development.
Remember that as a leader, it’s your role to make each person feel included and respected, and avoid perceptions of favoritism — even if it’s unintentional.
Check your own biases
We all have unconscious biases that can influence our decisions without us even realizing it. Be sure to take time to reflect on your own preferences and assumptions to help you make fairer choices.
Consider whether certain team members remind you of yourself, share similar interests, or have qualities you naturally favor, and be mindful of how this might impact your decisions.
Stay aware of your biases to help you keep a balanced perspective.
Take diversity or bias-awareness training to help recognize and reduce any tendencies, and to support a more inclusive and fair workplace.
Favoritism in the workplace FAQs
How can I tell if favoritism is happening in my workplace?
Favoritism can be subtle and isn't always openly acknowledged. If you notice consistent patterns, such as certain people repeatedly receiving special treatment without clear, performance-based reasons, you could be seeing signs of favoritism.
This might include being assigned to high-profile projects, frequent praise, or exclusive privileges. If these perks aren't based on experience, skills, or measurable results, favoritism might be involved.
How do I complain about favoritism at work?
If favoritism is affecting your work environment, document specific instances with dates and details.
Start by having a private conversation with your manager, focusing on personal development and asking for feedback on how to contribute more.
If change doesn’t happen, or the issue feels too big, bring it to HR. When you talk to them, focus on the impact on team morale, productivity, and fairness, rather than personal grievances.
How should HR handle favoritism complaints?
When HR receives complaints about favoritism, it’s important that they conduct a thorough, unbiased review.
Begin by meeting with the complainant to gather details and documentation.
Next, speak with the manager involved and other team members for insight.
Determine whether favoritism affects work assignments, promotions, or other areas, and if it is or isn’t causing inequity.
Remind everyone of the organization's commitment to fairness and ensure any future decisions are made using objective criteria.
Address complaints by reinforcing equal treatment policies and providing training if necessary.
Be transparent during the process to help build trust and create a balanced work environment.
What are some ways to promote a fair workplace culture?
If you’re in a leadership role, there are lots of ways to promote workplace fairness. Here’s a few ideas:
Set transparent criteria for decisions on assignments, promotions, and recognition.
Ensure equal opportunities for all.
Hold regular feedback sessions to help identify and address issues early.
Avoid favoritism by rotating tasks and opportunities, allowing everyone to grow.
Recognize contributions from everyone and maintain professional relationships with all employees.
Get diversity, inclusion, and bias awareness training for hiring and promotion decisions so you can ensure merit-based choices.
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